


observations of a ninja

by gladdecease



Category: Naruto
Genre: Gen
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2007-04-11
Updated: 2007-04-10
Packaged: 2017-10-17 06:40:59
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 3
Words: 1,972
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/173996
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/gladdecease/pseuds/gladdecease
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Ninja are expected to be observant.  Not all are <i>self</i>-observant, though perhaps they should be.</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. on a life-long mission

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> He knows what made a proper ninja and what does not. For example, he knows exactly how the chuunin exams would have been without Orochimaru's attack. This is because Shino sees many things, and understands even more.

Aburame Shino is what one would call "observant." He remains quiet, a mystery to his classmates, teammates, and colleagues alike. This is a great advantage to ninja - though it may be somewhat worrisome for a genin of thirteen to be more aware than his superiors.

Without being told otherwise, he comprehends the many "what-ifs" his colleagues contemplate. This is because of his observations, and his abilities as a ninja. Case in point: the outcome of his first chuunin exam.

If the chuunin exams of the year of Sandaime Hokage-sama’s death had been completed correctly, Nara Shikamaru would not have been the only genin to become a chuunin. The ninja from the Sand were incredibly capable, and also the oldest, and therefore most experienced, participating. Hyuuga Neji, of the only Leaf genin team not just out of the Academy, was equally capable. It was just his bad luck to be placed against the one ninja his talents could not overwhelm.

Nara Shikamaru would not have been the only _rookie_ genin to become a chuunin either. Uchiha Sasuke showed greater power than expected, even when considering his legacy. Uzumaki Naruto, had he more opportunity to show his other skills, might have passed... depending on how he fought against Uchiha Sasuke in the second round. Those two bring out the best in each other.

Shino sees all of this. He also sees that he would have passed as well. His raw ability was greater than the majority of candidates (though not by choice).

This is not boasting, but fact.

In his graduating class, Shino sees many unable of becoming ninja. They are too much like the children they would have been in a civilian school - playing around, laughing and joking, having crushes, best friends, and worst enemies. Only those students who have great intelligence or who have experienced great sadness understand the true meaning of becoming a ninja.

Those girls who attempt to draw Sasuke’s attention do not understand. Romances at the age of twelve are foolish. Those who fight amongst themselves, no matter the reason, do not understand. Rivalries within a Hidden Village, where emphasis should be placed on the enemy being _without_ , not within, are foolish.

A ninja should not allow their feelings to cloud their actions. To risk one's life, or one's mission, in an attempt to impress or one-up someone, is suicidal. The mission should be the sole concern of every ninja involved.

More than anyone else of his age, Shino understands. This is because his entire life is a mission.

Since he was born, he has housed within his body _kekkai_ insects. In return for giving them a food supply (his chakra) and a home (his body), the insects will fight for him, following his commands like soldiers. If Shino should ever slip in his chakra control, use up too much chakra at once, or even get overexcited in a normal situation, there will be terrible consequences for himself and everyone around him.

This responsibility was forced on him at birth. He understands the importance of his abilities, and recognizes that there might come a day when he wishes he had not been made a true member of his clan.

That day is not today.

So, between now and that day - if it ever comes - Shino will do his best to succeed in this mission.

He has always understood the consequences of failing.


	2. filled with kindness

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> As he sits, closer to death than he has ever been, he reflects. He knows he is strong. He knows he is strong for his friends, his family, and his village. He knows he should thank them. Chouji knows he is kind.

When Akimichi Chouji is a very young boy, he is a very sad boy.

You see, Chouji is what we would call "overweight," or "fat" on a bad day. In a ninja village, being overweight lends to being slow. One of the most dangerous things a person can be is slow. The other is stupid.

Both will get you captured or killed by enemy ninja.

Thus, villagers are taught from when they are small to always be fast. Even the games they play are meant to train them in speed - the "ninja" game combines the speed needed on missions with the accuracy of weapons throwing. It is this very game which gives Chouji his problems; quite simply, the boy is not good at the game.

He is almost immediately shunned by all but one of the children playing - the one who sees beyond the game is the seldom active, often sleeping, and rumored-genius Nara Shikamaru. Shikamaru is Chouji’s first friend, and he will treasure him always. Having been shunned by every other child his own age, Chouji knows the value of someone who truly likes him.

Expressing this to his father brings a reminiscent smile to Akimichi Chouza’s face. When asked, he merely tells Chouji that Shikamaru will not be his only friend. Because he is an Akimichi, he is big; this is a natural state, and makes Akimichi the only ones able to use their family jutsu. However, because he is Chouji, he is kind; this is not as natural, and certainly not as common among ninja.

Many ninja are distrustful - the larger clans, the Hyuuga and Uchiha, which feel they have something infinitely more important to hide or protect, are prime examples of this. Many ninja are cruel, and take a sadistic pleasure from fighting. But Chouji is Chouji, and Chouji is kind.

Some see Chouji's kindness as weakness.

They say "enemy ninja will trick and defeat him easily," but that is not what kindness means.  
They say "enemy ninja will escape if they tell a sad story," but that is not what kindness means.  
They say "he will never be able to kill an enemy ninja," but that is not what kindness means.  
They say "enemy ninja this" and "enemy ninja that," but that is not what kindness is about.

Kindness does not concern Chouji's enemies, but his allies.

Strong ninja are sometimes overconfident; they believe they can take on anything, accomplish any mission by themselves. Missions are not meant to be done by one person, or they would be assigned to one person. An overconfident ninja is a risk to any mission they are assigned to, unless they are suitably controlled.

Stronger ninja know better; they need to work together, and to work efficiently, to accomplish any mission. This is not enough - it is one thing to try to work together, and quite another thing to do it. Ninja who do not get along, or who do not have compatible abilities will be as useless as an overconfident ninja.

The strongest ninja know best; they know the value of working with ninja they trust.

Trust is difficult for some ninja to earn; likewise, it is easy for some. Some ninja prefer to give their trust based on how strong other ninja are; some prefer to give their trust based on familiarity; others still prefer to give their trust based on character and personality.

Chouji’s kindness puts him with the latter group in both cases. It is easy to trust Chouji, and it is easy for Chouji to trust people. He knows that he can trust his teammates to watch his back, and they know they can trust him to watch their backs.

This trust gives Chouji strength, and his father tells him it will make him a very strong ninja.

As Chouji kills his first enemy ninja, at the age of thirteen, because he promised his friend that he would stop this ninja, he reflects.

And, as Chouji sits closer to death than he has ever been, he knows he is strong. He knows he is strong for his friends, his family, and his village. He knows he should thank them.

He knows he is kind.

Then the darkness takes him, and he knows no more.


	3. too deep in love

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> She thinks to herself: I love him. It only occurs to her later that this might be a mistake, but by then it is far too late, and Sakura is in far too deep.

Haruno Sakura looks at Uchiha Sasuke one day, as he lies pale and shivering on his hospital bed, as he has every day for the last month. She places a new daffodil in the vase, as she has every day for the last month. She stays by his side, jerking at the slightest movement, as she has every day for the last month.

She thinks to herself: I love him.

It only occurs to her later that this might be a mistake, but by then it is far too late, and she is in far too deep.

She still loves Sasuke when he flings away her concern. The apple slices - all that she can do for him right now - hit the wall, and she flinches instinctively. He is so cold... not at all the Sasuke who let her hug him, hold him, cry into his shoulder and reassure herself that he was alive.

But she does not worry. Sasuke was relaxing his guard earlier, that’s all. He saw how worried she was, and understood that fear, and sympathized. It’s okay; he let her sob, and now he’s back to normal. It’s fine.

She still loves Sasuke when he and Naruto nearly kill each other. She sees his willingness to do anything to gain power, to grow stronger, and grows afraid. If he could attack a teammate with the intent to kill, what would be next?

She reassures herself. Sasuke may want power, but so does Naruto, and he certainly wouldn’t do anything drastic. He’ll be fine. They’ll be fine. We’ll be fine.

But then... Naruto wouldn’t be giving people long looks, like he was trying to memorize their faces, like he wouldn’t be seeing them for a long time. He wouldn’t be leaving training early without giving a reason, and buying a new, larger backpack on the way home. He wouldn’t... but Sasuke is.

Fearing the worst, but not telling anyone just in case, she goes to that bench. It isn’t intentionally for that first conversation - the bench is also located closest to the most people who could subdue Sasuke, if it comes down to that.

And then he is there, and she starts to ramble - she knows he doesn’t care, that what she is saying doesn’t affect him at all. He’s already decided, and any chance she had to say what she could have said is lost.

So she says everything, though she knows it’s pointless. She gives him her heart, her life, her love - her everything. Tries to convey in words the impossibly indescribable feelings she has for him. How she doesn’t care that he’s Uchiha Sasuke, she doesn’t care that he’s Number One Rookie, she doesn’t care that he’s a genius.

He’s Sasuke, and that’s all that matters.

And, for a moment, Sakura thinks her heart will break, because he says nothing, does nothing.

Then he thanks her.

As the world fades to black, she realizes how awful it is to love someone for their flaws.

She feels so empty when she wakes up. She can’t place why until Naruto points out her feelings. Then she remembers - she gave Sasuke her heart.

He must have taken it with her.

Then the tears start falling, and everything _hurts too much_ , and she wishes she could stop loving Sasuke. If she stopped loving him, it would stop hurting to think that he’s gone, that he’s left and gone.

But she can’t, of course. Not like Sasuke’s fans, who were momentarily heartbroken, but moved on to their next idol easily. She isn’t like them.

She doesn’t love Sasuke for his pretty face; there are a dozen more in the village.

She doesn’t love Sasuke for his genius clan; there are other clans besides Uchiha in the village.

She loves Sasuke for Sasuke; there is only one of him anywhere.

And even on her worst days, when the aching emptiness fills her completely, and she wishes she could take back that day when she looked at Sasuke at his weakest and loved him anyway, she knows it is far too late, and she is in far too deep.

She thinks to herself: I love him.

Then she cries.


End file.
